We have come a long way when it comes to embracing our blackness, just think years ago a lot of us wanted to change our looks to fit the status quo. Now we embrace who we are and set the new standard. Black people celebrate being black all year round, however in February, this country acknowledges our culture. Some companies may have special products in the front of their stores to celebrate Black History Month, stores like Target and Bath & Body Works just to name a few.

It’s hard for any other culture to keep a blind eye to what we have overcome over the last couple of decades. I admire the challenges and how we persevere despite the closed doors or disgruntled looks people give when they doubt our doings. Our ancestors are so dope! They paved the way and instilled grit in a lot of us. However, this does not come easy, being turned down moment after moment, doors being shut in our face, and the judicial system constantly reminding us that we don’t matter is quite frustrating. So how do we do it, well I can tell you one thing that I do when I am feeling doubtful or discouraged. I extend self-love to myself.

Self Love Is The Best Love

Reflecting: I reflect on the most challenging thing I had to do and thus far. I think of the steps I took and how motivated I was in not giving up. This encourages me to move forward and know that if I was able to get through that challenge, I can get over the next one. Challenges help you become who you are, and it reminds you of why you started doing that thing you are so passionate about.
Affirmations: reading, writing and saying affirmations is key. At times, I say the affirmation, others times I put I am…in front of whatever affirmation I want to say to myself. We say I am tired, I am sick, or I a frustrated. Change the narrative and put I am in front of the word and it helps change the mindset.
Planning: putting myself on the schedule is key. There is a saying that states; if you don’t choose a day to rest, your body will choose it for you. This is critical, I’d rather pick a day I want to rest as opposed to the latter. Pencil yourself in because no one will do it for you. Schedule a day where you don’t answer calls, you watch tv, read a book or go for a walk, whatever it is, allow your mind to rest. If you find a hard time to pencil out a day to do these things, pencil out 20-30 mins or even an hour if possible, you deserve it. We have a tendency to think we are running this race and have to do things immediately, but who says that you have to do that? This is your life and you can go at a pace that is convenient for you.
Reward Yourself: grant yourself some grace. Take a moment and buy that thing that makes you smile. It can be something as small as a treat or a major gift you had your eye on for months. You deserve it, don’t wait for someone to reward you, you should be rewarding yourself.

Most importantly make sure you are getting YOU together. We can’t pour from an empty cup and although people may be depending on us, they deserve our best selves. Heck, we deserve our best selves! Not every day is going to be great and yes we will have our down days, but when we put ourselves first it feels good. Here at Helpful Living Magazine, we are a resource people can dive into and learn how to better themselves and others around them. How and what conversations to have and most importantly how to listen and how to be heard. These are all important factors and we have the resource that is needed. Find out more here, start taking action and learn how to embrace yourself. If you don’t do it then who will?